Deep in the Castle of Perverted Things and Stuff, Kagato and Bonehead were making their way towards the room which housed the captives, Ken and Richard.
--------- Down below, strapped on the operating tables, Richard was finally beginning to awaken."It sure is taking us a long time to get there, master," Bonehead said.
"Tell me about it," Kagato said. "Seems we've been on our way there for the past three or four member profiles now."
"Eh?"
"Uh, nothing, let's just keep going. Oh look, there's the door now," Kagato said, pointing towards a large door at the end of a barren looking hall. "This place could use a good cleaning, eh, boney?"
"Master is right, it is pretty dusty."
"Seems I can never find any time to do anything amidst all the probing and electronical perversion. Eh. Whadda ya gonna do?" Kagato opened the door and entered, followed briskly by his hunched back companion. "Wha? These guys aren't very attractive."
"Maybe master doesn't like this gender?"
"Nah. I always enjoy it, but these guys almost make me sick. It just doesn't seem right."
"Would master like me to dispose of them?"
"Nah, no use in wasting perfectly good subjects. I'll just probe them and kill them myself. You know, things used to be so great back in the day when Sasami and all the rest were still alive. But, after a few millinia, they kinda wore out, and eventually passed on, my hunger for this disgusting habit growing ever stronger. I wander why that is. Ah, well. No need for questions now, let's get to some probing."
"Finally you're awake," Ken said. "It's about time."
"Yeh, it seems I was asleep for at least three or four member profiles," Richard moaned.
"Hmm, what an odd thing to say."
"Anyway, where am I?"
"I already told you, deep within Kagato's lair."
"Kagato? That name sounds familiar."
"It should, he's the main villain in about every single Tenchi story."
"Ah, yes. Tenchi. Good ole Tenchi. What about Tenchi?"
Suddenly huge probes and tenticles started descending from the ceiling, all looking very dangerous and pointy.
"What are those things?" Richard asked, still shaking some of the sleep from his head. "And, why am I tied down?"
"Ugh. We're gonna be killed and probed by viscious tenticles and probes, you moron! We're gonna die!! You get it now?!!"
"Probes?"
"Yes!"
"Tenticles?!"
"YES!!"
"This sounds like a fanfic I read one time."
Up at the top, Kagato was pulling levers and descending probes from a huge computer.
"This has been so easy handling since Windows 95 came out. I can just point and click, point and click."
"Yes sir," Bonehead seemed a bit detached.
"I wander, how many people have we killed in this universe?"
"Oh, a good portion sir."
"Yeh. You know, I've been thinking. Maybe I should just not do this anymore. It's really quite sick, and I don't even know why I do it anymore. Their terror doesn't even excite me, you know? It's just become kind of a habit."
Yes sir."
"What do you think, boney?" Kagato asked, when suddenly, Bonehead rushed at him, pulling out a large knife and stabbing him in the heart with it.
"WHAT'D YOU DO THAT FOR?!!" Kagato screamed.
"Just seemed like the right thing to do," the hunchback said. "All this senseless killing is kinda been annoying these past millinia. I couldn't kill you before, but now, since you've killed and probed all your servants and allies, I guess I could finally get a chance."
Suddenly, in a burst of glitter and pink, a magician suddenly appeared, clad in purple and holding a magic wand.
"That's good, Boney," this magician said. "Good work."
"Thank you, Maji."
"Who the heck is that?!" Kagato moaned, taking his final breaths in fits of agony and pain.
"I guess you'll have to wait and find out," Bonehead said, turning from his dying master to the screen and smiling mysteriously.
Back down in the dungeon, Ken and Richard were looking up at the tenticles very confused.
"They stopped," Ken gasped.
"Man," Richard moaned. "This is getting weird!!"